Went with him to get his taxes done****

It is unfortunate, but many men do what they can to avoid paying child support. My suggestion to you is that you consult an experienced family attorney. You will want to have help in the paternity suit. After that, consider what you might do to care for your baby without him. If he is willing to get paid under the table and lie about it on his taxes to avoid paying, he may well be willing to simply not pay. That means you need to make sure your little one is cared for even if he doesn't help. I know it is not fair, after 9 years you thought your lives were with him. That doesn't change that your baby is depending on you. So, stay strong, do what you can legally to get your support, but let it be money above and beyond what you need to survive.

I just want him to sign over his rights. I'd rather him not pay anything & have nothing to do with our child.... but he wont do that. He wants visitation rights. After all, I didnt include him on the birth certificate because I went through the entire pregnancy by myself. I also wanted to know how visitation works when the child is just three months old and I DO NOT want the child going to his house (he lives with his family & girlfriend)

Blue3090, it depends on your state. My ex was just granted supervised visits 3 times a week with our 13 month old son. He is abusive and my kids and I have a restraining order against him. The guardian ad litem, knowing this guy has pending child abuse allegations against him, still ordered supervised visits. The visits are supervised by his grandma, which is crazy, because his entire family is abusive (and there is proof). If they send my baby to see an abuser 3 times a week, I'm pretty sure they'll let your baby stay with your ex and his gf. I'm sorry. I know it sucks. Trust me, I really do.

I live in NY. We have no restraining orders but I know for a fact that my ex takes steroids and is bipolar. This is by far one of the stupidest countries. My ex and his whole family begged me to have an abortion and harrassed me to do so for the first couple of months of my pregnancy. His mother is definitely crazy and I do not want my child around that family. I am going to do whatever it takes.. & then people are shocked when ex's kidnap their own children and harm them... I dont understand where the justice is in this country. Its very unfortunate.

Hi, blue3090, and welcome to WebAnswers.

I am sorry that you have had such difficulty here, but no New York court will permit your ex to sever his paternal rights AND obligations. It is further important to note that parenting time and child support are two disparate concepts.

What this means is that child support will be ordered to be paid, independently from visitation. Accordingly, your focus needs to be upon the terms of visitation and you will need FACTS and supporting evidence in order to convince a judge why visitation should be denied, or, in the alternative, why visitation should be highly supervised by a disinterested third party or an agency.

You will need all of the credible documentation you can muster, and, if you have not already been doing so, you should start a detailed log of any contacts with your ex, substantiated by whatever RELEVANT paper you have at your disposal, even if it is a receipt from 7-Eleven.

Thank you for your question.

I havent spoken to my ex since last may. The last text messages I have from him were to have an abortion. I have those messages as evidence because he was begging me to have one for four months. Its unbelieveable how I had to go through this & labor by myself and the courts dont care about his abandonment... how he was partying all summer and getting drunk and didnt even contact me when he found out that his child was born. Disgusted!

Thank you. I am definitely gathering all of my receipts and documentation.

Thank you, blue3090, for awarding my answer. Good luck to you and your child!